How to Move to a New Country
What I've learned so far in my move to Italy, along with links and resources to help guide anyone thinking of relocating to a new country
A few weeks ago, I asked is it time to leave the US?
I heard from many readers that they are either already making a move or seriously considering one. So today, I'll walk you through how I chose Italy as my new home and what I've learned so far.
If you are thinking of starting your own relocation process, I urge you to read this essay by
in and determine whether you are the kind of person who is cut out for creating a new life in a foreign country, including one where you may not speak the language.Gregory explains that it's important to know if you are a "Discovery" person or a "Security" person before you try living in another country. Can you tolerate serious inconvenience? Can you handle being so far away from your friends and family? Are you willing to make the effort to meet new people? And so on.
There is no right or wrong answer. It's just good to be realistic about who you are and what you need to feel happy and secure before making any big life changes.
If you think you are up for life in a new country, keep reading.
Using my experience as a guide, we will look at:
Defining your WHY
Honing your WHAT
Choosing WHERE
Navigating the HOW
My process is for people who really want to do research before moving. It’s not the only way to do this. I know people who went on vacation to Italy (like Zerlina Maxwell who I interviewed) and decided to move there. Sometimes people just follow their heart, like
who fell in love with an Italian and discovered that Italy was her true home.I. WHY
The first thing you have to do is get clear on your "why."
This will help you choose which countries to start investigating and also will be something to look back to when you face obstacles in your new home and wonder why you left everything you knew in the first place.
My "why" couldn't have been clearer: the way we live in the United States is not normal.
Interestingly, the political situation was not a driving force in my decision. But it is for others: data has shown that since the presidential election, research on "how to move abroad" has surged, and the New York Times reported that interest in digital nomad visas also increased after the election results.
I started my move when Biden was president, and even if Kamala Harris (who I voted for) had won, I wouldn't have reconsidered my decision.
The chronic stress, violence, disordered values1, and expense of life in the US that led to my move are not things that can be remedied easily. They can be fixed, but first, our leaders have to understand what's wrong, and I heard nothing during the election that made me think that either party has a good handle on the systemic problems that plague America.2 I’m hopeful that will change, but for now it’s not somewhere I want to live.
I want a simpler existence in a culture that prioritizes community and quality of life—much like this woman who moved to Greece with her daughter and is not looking back.
Whatever your reason, make sure that it's strong enough to carry you through the various frustrations that will arise as you adapt to a new culture.
When I get annoyed by Italian bureaucracy, I just stop and remind myself, "I'll never pay $7000 for dental surgery here," despite having insurance through my husband’s job, as I did a few weeks ago when I had the misfortune of being in the US when a tooth became infected and had to be removed. Had it happened a few weeks earlier when I was in Italy, the same surgery would have been around $300 dollars out of pocket.
Or, "I'll never fight with my health insurance company to reimburse me for a visit that is clearly covered by my policy because they hired a firm to help them reject more claims." I could list a million other things if I needed to, but that usually settles me right down.
The fact is, there are difficulties everywhere. You just have to decide which ones you want to live with.
II. WHAT
Once you have your "why," you need your "what," as in "What are my must-haves for my new home country?"
Here were the "must-a haves" I put on my list before I started looking:
Affordable. For me, this means not having to overwork to provide for the basics of life: food, water, housing, quality health care, a vacation now and then, and one trip to the US a year to see family. In particular, I wanted to be able to live off of the average salary in the country,3 not based on a US salary, because I no longer have a US salary.
Price Point: My husband and I decided our price point for purchasing a home would be $400,000. That was the amount we were comfortable taking (borrowing) from our retirement account, which we can repay when we sell our DC house in a few years.4 My husband's job requires him to be in the US, so he won't be joining me for a few years. So he will cover his expenses in DC, and I am responsible for mine in Italy. Renting is an excellent option if you don't have the money or inclination to buy in a new country.
Community-oriented. Key to this is having a government that creates the conditions for strong communities (worker protections, paid time off, walkable towns and cities, etc.).
Dog Friendly. One of the things we have loved when traveling to Italy is how easy it has been to bring our little Shih Tzu Lucy along with us. Entering the country has been easy (though it recently got a little harder, but is still not that onerous) and she is welcomed everywhere from Michelin star restaurants to the grocery store. We wanted the same thing wherever we moved.
Good investment property. Because my husband and I like to travel so much, we wanted a property that could be rented out during high season, which would help pay for the property over time and also give us a chance to explore.
Friendly people who are welcoming to outsiders. I did not want to move to a place where we were displacing people and participating in ruining the local culture or where people are disinterested in getting to know outsiders.
Thriving expat community: Though I planned to learn the language of my new home, I wanted to have a community of English speakers to socialize with until I became proficient in the language (the common language of expat communities is typically English).
Easy access to restaurants, museums, and cultural events
Close to (or in) nature, ideally near a swimmable ocean
Safe (No mass shootings or scourge of gun violence)
Good travel hub, meaning easy access to an international airport and train stations
III. WHERE
Our "where" and "why" put a lot of places in play, but as I ticked through the few that caught my eye—Panama, Spain, Portugal—my husband wasn't super excited. He has been nurturing a 35-year love affair with Italy, during which he learned to speak Italian. He also got me to fall in love with the people and the place through many trips to the land of la dolce vita over the last decade.
But our price point put it out of reach (or so we thought).